Profit Sharing Soda.

Sodas that you remove from the company refrigerator and drink, justifying this action by explaining that it’s your “profit sharing*.”

“Yowza, gents. I’m feelin’ a little parched after that ball-busting sales projections meeting. I think I’ll just have me one of these refreshing profit sharing sodas.”
- John, Sales Associate

*Assumes that you actually received no profit sharing recently. If you did, you’re just stealing.